film noir studies

Kia ora team,

for our literacy, we have been studying film noir which translates to black film. we had to make a plot for our film noir narrative. please tell me if there is anything else I can put in it. for our literacy, we have been studying film noir which translates to black film. we had to make a plot for our film noir narrative. my narrative is called: Missing; out of town. Please tell me if there is anything else I can put in it.

Bob was a businessman he was under a lot of stress at work and he went to the bar and saw a man sitting in the corner staring at him every time bob went to the bar he would be staring at him and one day asked the bartender who he was the bartender said his name was one-toothed jack an ex-detective now he works for himself as a pi.

Melissa had an affair with bobs brother. One day bob and his wife went on a road trip to Kansas and stayed in a cabin. bob woke up and found that his wife was gone and he called the police to report a missing person report the police came to the batch to examine where they had gone they found nothing. Bob hired one-toothed jack to find where his wife was he then found out that his brother and his wife were together and disappeared to be with each other. Bob saw all of his money was missing from his and Malissa’s bank account.

please make sure to tell me if there is anything that could go better.